Friday, September 10, 2010

Being Okay with Undone

It felt like a marathon, but it was just my normal Friday.  It started early, devotions and coffee.  Then a speedy (my speediest ever-grin) 3.5 miles.  After showers and breakfast we cruised right into school and knocked off grammar, math, spelling and few other things, then sped through chores.  By lunchtime the house was basically clean, school was done, laundry was through and we were off to the grocery store.
Then it happened.  I glanced around the house and thought to myself, “man, I’d love to get the furniture moved around in here.”  It’s that little thing I like to do when the seasons change, a symptom of my seasonal furniture disorder-you can call me a compulsive furniture mover and I’ll totally agree. 
But I’ve digressed, on to that little voice.  The voice whispered in my ear, it said something about not being able to get it all done.  It sounded awful judgmental, this voice of mine.  And for a little while, I listened and forgot about all the other things I’d accomplished before noon.
Now, I’m not trying to toot my own horn or anything by talking about my super productive morning-this post isn’t about that.  It’s about that pesky voice, the one that compares me to others or even to my own perfectionist tendencies.  I’m thinking it’s a voice that isn’t unique to me, at least I sure am hoping that it’s not.  But it’s a voice that so often stops me in my tracks and totally forces me into discontentment.  It’s a voice that I do not want to listen to.  It’s a voice that steals my joy.  It’s a voice that forces me to be super critical of myself.  And because it produces absolutely nothing positive, I’m pretty sure that it’s a voice that doesn’t come from God. 
I made a decision today, I decided not to listen to that voice.  I told it to take a hike and then I shifted my perspective.  I looked at my three kiddos who were dealing with a super crabby mom who was trying to do too much in too little time, and I apologized.  Then I decided to be happy with what I had done, I’m not Super Woman after all.  I thumb wrested with the kids while we were waiting at the grocery store, and we laughed and I was totally cool with all the undone.  I picked out a few movies at the library in anticipation of family movie night.
Later on Zac took over as super dad so I could get some of that undone stuff done, and then something amazing happened.  A kid swap with the neighbors left us without any girls but with an extra boy.  Then two boys, and one extra friend and one Dad went out for pizza.  And all of that left me alone.  A.L.O.N.E.  at home, for several hours.  Isn’t this every mother’s dream?  Guess what I did? 
2010 09 10_0936
I went on archeology dig, I mean I moved some furniture.  Some things work out, don’t they?
Oh, and when I hear that little voice again I’m going to tell it to take off sooner.

5 comments:

  1. No, you're not the only one with 'that voice'.

    I've been reading "Battlefield of the Mind" and it's been GREAT! I'd highly recommend it in regards to veiwing your thought life as a battlefield.

    AND, Just the other day I saw this bumper sticker that said:
    "Don't believe everything you think"
    Love that!

    ALl the best with your re-arranging - I also got some un-expected (yet much needed) time to myself this weekend! Woop, woop!!

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  2. Yes, things do have a way of coming together without all the self-imposed deadlines and stresses. A great discovery and freedom too!!

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  3. Love this. :) From the running your personal best to the getting time alone and everything inbetween... Thanks for sharing.

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  4. This is really good, Gina. You're very true. That voice is very sneaky and tends to show up when it's least welcome. You're right - we should tell that voice to take a hike. Discontentment is a joy-killer and the Lord wants us, in every circumstance and stage of undone-ness to Rejoice! Again, I say Rejoice :)

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