Wednesday, April 24, 2013

one of those days




For when the days are long and the nights are short, way too short. 

For when you want to run and hide and get away as fast you possibly can. Even if it’s just the grocery alone. Or to drive aimlessly around the neighborhood without Kids Rock 80s Gold blaring through the mini van.

For the days when you can’t handle one more question. Or one more dispute. Or one more shrill scream of injustice from the younger sibling.

For the days when judgement comes and comparison seems bigger than your grocery bill. 

For those days.

We’ve all been there. And we all wonder how we’ll get to other side of raising kids without killing them. 

Somedays you just have to duck in the pantry while they scream. Bonus, that’s where the dark chocolate is hiding.

Hiding does not make you a bad parent.

Not wanting to take part in endless, mindless games that make sticking a fork in your eye seem appealing does not make you a bad parent.

I would contend that the fact that you want to run away is evidence that you are in actually a good parent. It means you have enough wits about you to know that you need a little self care. Because this whole parenting gig is pretty tough. 

It’s also a lot of fun, but you know that. Because you do have good days, blissful happy days full of play and endless wonder. Those are gifts. Because you also have the other days. The days when want to throw a match at the whole thing and run, not at the kids of course-but just in the general direction of your house and the front yard where toys go to die. You daydream of running away. You have visions of exotic beaches and margaritas. That does not make you a bad parent. 

Those are days where we throw up our hands and realize that even though it is indeed hard, it surely won’t last forever. Right? 

Those are the days where we straddle the joy and the anguish of tiny people in our house, where we laugh one minute and sob the next. 

Those are the days we call a friend or our mom and beg them to take us away. And because they love us they will.

Those are the days where we take care of ourselves for the sake of our children. It won’t make them miraculously obedient angels. But it will give you some breathing room, and that helps a lot when all hell breaks loose. Because it will if you live in a house with tiny dictators.

And those are the days you just buckle up and pray for the strength to enjoy the ride before it’s over. 

Those are the days we don’t loose heart because we know we are doing the most important and vital thing in the world. We are raising future parents, future decision makers, future world changers. And so on those days, we go on, with one eye firmly on the goal and one eye rooted to the right now. Because the right now, where it’s messy and difficult and relentless, right now, is where the magic happens.

Those are the days we pray for the Good Lord to give us grace to see it.

2 comments:

  1. AMEN!


    You have no idea how MANY times the Spirit in me nudges me/reminds me/talks me into/ smacks me back into grace. If He didn't I would miss the joy on this wild parenting ride.

    And as for hiding in the pantry where the chocolate is... PRAISE GOD for pantries with chocolate. :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am convinced that life would not go on without heavy doses of Grace and equal amounts of dark chocolate :)

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